Love, What Have You Done To Me?
Found the Love of my life about 7yrs ago when I was still in High School. A new GSM Communication Provider opened in our country and my sister used to work for them as the Managing Director’s Secretary. That gave me some kind of power in school, I used to brag a lot about it because my sister was the Prom Queen of her time in High School and she had a lot of followers (her gang) I wasn’t beautiful compared to her. So I was always happy to tell people that she is my sister even though the comments I get from them were not always nice, like “Oh, but she’s beautiful, and fair you don’t look alike at all,” but that doesn’t bother me at all because I love my sister and I know that she loves me too.
One day after school I went to her office because my Nokia phone had a problem, which was the latest phone at that time lol… There I met this guy his name is Raima. I used to call him the love of my life now am so ashamed of that, because it was nothing but a teenage crush. He was considered as the hottest guy in town and every girl wants to date him, including me the hideous Nancy lol… and never mind the fact that he did not even look in my way it was like I was invisible. He spent close to 10mins in my sister’s office chatting with her as they joked and laughed. I was enjoying the whole thing and would have given anything for him to look my way for just 2 seconds because I knew that he knew I was in the room with them. I don’t think I’ve ever told any one this before, but 2yrs later I graduated from High School and one of my sister’s friend was getting married. I was to be the bride’s maid so in the days prior to the wedding I was going to my sister’s office almost every day about the wedding preparation — dress fitting, shopping and stuff and I was hoping to see him there but I never did. I never gave up hope that he was not going to be in the wedding because I wanted him to see I beautiful I was, but he never showed up.
A week after the wedding the pictures were out and my sister was looking at them in her office and her boss saw them too and immediately told my sister to call me because he wants to see me face to face. The company was looking for models. They had been interviewing for 2 days, but with no luck. So when I talked to the MD and he told me to go to the audition, I did for the 3rd and 4th day. A month after that I started working for the company as their advertising model. I was so happy 
because it was like a dream come true ever since I was a kid I wanted to become a model and there I was Miss Jamaica 2004.
Two weeks after my contract, I received a call on my mobile phone and OMG it was him I couldn’t believe it! We talked for a while that first time. After that we were always talking on the phone or sending each other text messages. I wanted to date him but I couldn’t because I was already seeing another guy for more than a year and I couldn’t break-up with him just like that. So I told him that I want to be friends and nothing more, but he wanted to be more than just friends. Before long we started going out on lunch dates and that’s when I noticed that every time we are together he tried to take a picture of us and I always refuse fearing that my boy friend might see it and I didn’t want to loss him. We went on like this for a month or so. I can remember the first time he kissed me. I cried because I waited for it so long. Dreamt about it. Then it happened.
He was surprise that I was crying and he tried to calm me down, but the more he tried, the more I cried. I’m not proud of this. Two months after that, I broke-up with my boyfriend because he was cheating on me with my cousin it was one of the saddest times in my life. I was so mad that I refused to date Raima because of my ex-boyfriend. That’s when I started STALKING him.
First, I send him text messages and his friend replied, telling me that he went back to University for his Masters Degree. I was so heart broken; I cried the whole night and the next day. He called me the following day to say that his friend told him that I left a message. We talked for like 5mins then he hang-up. After that, I didn’t hear from him for 2 to 3 months so I texted his uncle and begged him for his phone number. He said he didn’t have it, but will delivery my message. I told his uncle to tell Raima that I love him.
The following week, when I went to work I was on Google searching for him on the internet! You can’t believe how many Raima’s came up. It was like half of the male population in Lebanon are called Raid lol…. So after a while I added his surname and found out that there are a lot of Raima — (EDITOR’S NOTE: Please Submit your Google Stalking Story, but leave out last names.) in the world. Somehow I came across information about Raima —- on hi5. I didn’t have a hi5 profile at the time, so I had a limited access, but I quickly became a member. I spent a week designing my page just to impress him. When I was satisfied with the results, I clicked on his page and added him as a friend and sent him a message telling him that it was me.
He replied me the following day with his email address asking me to add him on my msn. I was too embarrassed to tell him that I didn’t have a hotmail account, so I joined and installed msn on my computer. We chatted on msn that day and I sent him a very long letter telling him how much I love him and that I wanted to date him. He replied the following day telling me that he is only interested if am willing to have sex with him. I was so mad that I sent him another long letter telling him what I thought of him. The truth was that he was only interested in me because I was famous during the time he asked me to date him, but when I stopped working as a model and became a teacher he changed his mind. So we never dated, and I’m glad we didn’t.
